User blog:Madman97/You know what really grinds my Wabbajack's? Season 2 Premiere.

Guess who's back? If you guessed Madman97, then your an idiot. The answer is Madman97 and DAVE, a totally not imaginary friend who is not from inside my head, come to bring you the kick-off episode to the Season 2 of wabbajack grinding. It is a beautiful day in Tamriel, ripe for the ranting, and to bring something new and hip to the table, we will e ranting about things in both Skyrim AND Oblivion, that's right, as cool as it was, Oblivion wasn't perfect, though it came pretty dang close. How are you today Dave?

Dave: I just woke up. You suck.

Madman97: Thank you very much Dave. Alright, without further ado, let's dive right-

Mike: Hey guys, what's up? Oh my god, are you guys doing a rant?

Dave: Get back to your cage, Mike, no one likes you.

Mike: I don't wanna!

Madman97: Mike...Remember the last time you interrupted me?

Mike:...I'm gonna go now. (Mike exits the Internet)

Madman97: Sorry about that, he's my annoying neighbor. Anyway, let's dive right in. You know what really grinds my Wabbajacks? Followers. In general.

Dave: I'm sure you guys have heard about the AI systems in the Elder Scrolls. Well, they suck. Have you ever noticed when your partner just runs headlong into trouble?

Madman97: Now, I don't expect perfect AI that can think and formulate battle strategies. The AI was greatly built upon from Oblivion to Skyrim so at least your Follower can do a little more than get him or herself killed.

Dave: Yeah, this time, they get you killed. (Laughs)

Madman97: Everyone in Skyrim has at least had one instance where their follower either gets killed because they are stupid or get you killed because there stupid...unless the player him or herself was just being an idiot. I almost never have a follower with me.

Dave: Except J'zargo because he's freaking awesome.

Madman97: So many instances where I have to save his @$$ because he decides to fire a lightning bolt at a  pasty-faced falmer motherF***er when Im trying to sneak past him, and in two hits he is down, and then they come at me before I have a chance to reload my game, an while I try to revive him with my healing spell, I accidently blast the Flamer with chain lightning that I chose by mistake and disintegrated my friend. Just, whenever I have a freaking follower, there is always some kind of fiasco or disaster that makes me reset my game and I have to go back through a dungeon ALL THE WAY AGAIN.

Dave: Potema, is that here name? The wolf queen catacombs in solitude, was the F***ing worst. I memorized how the entire dungeon went, every trap, every place where a Draugr would come up, and I knew the exact right spells, but guess what? My freaking follower keeps getting in the way and gets 4800 points of fire damage to the knees and dies, and I had to keep reloading. The catacombs are built in such a way that it is narrow and hard to fire off a magic spell without hitting your partner since mine always runs ahead of me. I wasn't really well suited to handheld weapons fighting yet, so I had to use magic. I was also at a point where the Draugr could kill me in like two hits. So it was very difficult, and I needed proper cannon fodder to get me through.

Madman97: This was all before we dicovered the perfect tool...Drum roll please. (Commencing drum roll). Sanguine Rose!!!

Dave: This was by like pure luck we foun this thing. Madman97 here never played the Elder Scrolls before Skyrim when I have, and I knewthe Sanguine Rose sucked because the Daedra you summoned were always hostile after they defeated your enemies. Well, we were not powerful enough to fend off a full blown dremora, and when we discovered that the dremora in Skyrim you summoned was ust yours period, It freaking blew our mind. Since we got it, it has not left our inventory. They serve as the perfect cannon fodder.

Madman97: Alright, we found a solution to our problems, but in the earlier levels, we were royally F***ed when we ran out of soul energy stuff and needed to find more soul gems. These things were freaking hard to come by in earlier levels. Everywhere I checked was something else. In the earlier levels, anything I found that I actually needed, I treated it as priceless. I remember a quest that had you collect five Fire Salts. Well of course, I had like twenty before then, but right when the quest got around, I had absolutly none, and I couldn't find any. but anyway, same with soul gems, and we were basically struggling to survive, back when Skyrim was actually not boring to play nowadays, so we needed followers. WELL GODDANGIT, THESE FOLLOWERS SUCK!!! THEY DO MORE HARM THAN GOOD, THEY CONSTANTLY GET IN TROUBLE, THEY CONSTANTLY GET YOU IN TROUBLE, AND THEY ARE NOT WORTH DRAGGING ALONG. WANT MY ADVICE? SANGUINE ROSE. IT MAY BE A AN OVERPOWERED RELIC<,BUT BY GOD, USE IT. IT SAVES YOU SO MUCH TROUBLE WHEN THE FOLLOWER IS ACTUALLY POWERFUL ENOUGH TO STAND UP TO THE OPPONENT. (sigh)

Dave: Really, this topic is an overused one, and we apoligize for bringing it up again. Madman97 here is running out of things to rant about, so if you guys could give hima few ideas-

Madman97: Nonsense! I have tons of ideas, ones that will incite the rantist of feelings from within!

Dave: Heh, you sound like Turl off of Nostalgia Critic's Battlefield Earth Review.

Madman97: Now that is just mean. The audience knows we would bring up followers sometime. So why not now?

Dave: This topic should be a filler topic in between the start and finish of a season. You need a really solid rant for a beginning and end, with the end having a slightly bigger bang.

Madman97: Well, at least we have it out of the way. Well you heard it here folks, and Season 2 has finally begun after the very long wait you have had to endure.

Dave: Four days?

Madman97: That's a very long time. I have had to wait for the past week for Saints Row 4 to come out tomorrow and every day feels like an eternity!

Dave: We should probably break this off before people get upset at the length of this one. We're Dave and Madman97 signing off. What is it you say? Stay Ranty? Yeah, Stay Ranty, and again, welcome back to what really grinds your wabbajacks.