User blog comment:HeartOnFire18/Becoming thane of The Pale/@comment-26213507-20180918031741

Try "increasing your fame" by doing some other quests for a while. Also, make sure taking the Pale isn't a current objective of the Liberation of Skyrim, in case that's somehow the problem (though I doubt it, since you want to be thane). If not, I guess you might have to try waiting or going to jail in Dawnstar.