Board Thread:Off Topic/@comment-16621739-20131117093245/@comment-202.156.139.88-20140522134929

I dunno if i should troll more (I posted one way back on entropy as a joke, I think I posted on on Sorrow, might be on another thread, there's Lord Hadron's DP incarnation as a sick joke and finally the physics guy). Whatever.

Vystorm Tryophon, Daedric prince of life (not the Meridia sense, but the visceral, survival of the fittest, biological sense)

Appearance: An average joe who wears daedric armor comprised of tentacles. 6 long tentacles grow from his back and his fingers are tipped with talons. Has black eyes that contain glowing green irises, with slit pupils. He casts spells that look like flame spells, except they are green and poison their targets. Also uses a sword similar to Miraak's sword and a bow that looks like a mass of tentacles.

Realm: The Enchanted Forest - A lush tropical jungle like environment filled with beautiful flowers, giant trees and teeming with fauna, except all the plants are actually extremely poisonous, many are carnivorous (and enjoy eating animals) and some are sentient and walk. Creatures evolve at extreme rates, try to outcompete one another and prey on each other constantly. The realm contains all extinct animals and life there is a constant struggle to be the top predator. The daedra are glittery green snakes that spit poison and summon tentacles.

Artifacts:

The staff of evolution - sort of like the wabbajack, except it always transforms the target into something more suited to its environment and makes it way more powerful. Instantly kills anything with too many genetic defects (e.g. anyone who would win Darwin awards - Skyrim edition). Not to be used on friends (lol). Carrying it grants bonus EXP whenever you kill an enemy.

The blade of extinction - a tentacular blade (Imagine hermaeus mora as the hilt!) that stretches when it is swung (ala Miraak's sword). It poisons its targets for tonnnes of damage, causes them to slow down, bleeds them, has a chance to paralyse and drains all three attributes into the wielder. All at the same time. Ouch.

Amulet of Panspermia - shaped like an ourouboros (must have spelt it wrong), instantly summon up to 3 random creatures from The Enchanted Forest for no magicka. These creatures are not bound and will attack their summoner if he/she is the only target left.

Darwinian armor - a set of ebony armor that is covered in tentacles and green slime. It gives passive magic resist, tentacle burst againsts attackers and bonus stamina and magicka regen for the chestplate, muffle, poison immunity and disease immunity for the boots, 50% faster attack speed and 100% faster charge speed(for magic) for the gauntlets and + random stats that change every 10 seconds for the helmet (always adds a spreat of 120 total stats) When the wearer is not attacked, it grants passive health regen. When under attack, it will gain bonus elemental resist to the element used to attack it, cast dragonhide if attacked by physical damage, teleport the wearer away if the damage is supposed to be fatal, randomly increase the damage of the wearer or do nothing. After all, such is evolution. The full set is required to have the evolution effect.

Too much trolling on my part, really.