User blog:Madman97/You know what really grinds my Wabbajack's? Children in Skyrim.

Greetings lesser Madmen, tis I, the Madman, Sheogoraths 97th favorite, and I am here to talk to you about one of the greatest joys in Skyrim....Wait, I wrote that wrong. Joy implies happiness and content, but I feel none. Well duh! No wonder I feel that way! Because I was under the impression that children brought joy to life. Oh silly me....What a laugh.....

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WELL I AIN"T LAUGHING NOW!!!! You wanna know what grinds my wabbajacks, YOU REALLY WANNA FREAKING KNOW?!?!?!?! Children. Plain and simple.

Alright, let's get to the bottom of this rant. So I'm wandering Skyrim, start of the game, and I have come to seek an audience with the Jarl of Whiterun to tell him the dragon's have returned. Pretty heavy stuff. Alright so I'm walking in the door, all slowmo like and awesome, and I take a moment to let the sight of the grad hall intrigue me. As a descendant of the Skandinavian people, I have alway's apreciated Viking like architecture, and why I am so comfortable with being a Nord. What a nice ahll, this Jarl has really got it going on...

"Another wanderer, come to lick my father's boots, good job," said a voice behind me.

"What the hell?" said I. I turned around to find a little kid staring at me. At firt I was like, "Did you say something?" I was actually wondering whether or not the kid said this or not. When I concluded he did, I was like, "I'll deal with you in a sec, I got bigger dragons to kill." Lol, Skyrim humor.

Bad Skyrim jokes aside, I talked to the Jarl, stared at the kid menacingly for a few seconds, and then left to kill a dragon for te first time. I came back, all victorious. I was a hero, I have saed Whiterun! For glory, for  Rohan, and for more glory! I held my head high. I  was strolling up to the hall, and some little girl stood in my way. You may know her as...Braith, (Said with fire in eyes and bared teeth and angry tone).

"I could take you, but I'll go easy on you this time."

"Excuse me?"

"F*** you dragonborn!" (That's what I heard). Then it hit me.

ALL THE KIDS ARE LIKE THIS?!?!?! WTF?!?!?!? I'm sorry, it may see like a minor thing, but it's so distracting. It's just as bad as the annoying guards who think your new to the companions when your the FUC*ING HAREBRINGER OR WHATEVER IT"S CALLED! I can get why te Jarl's kid is a little snot, I mean, abuse of daddy's authority and what not, but are we so unknown to the public that even the KIDS think we're chumps?!?!?

What a bunch of BS. WHy can't there be a option where you actually TELL people you are the dragonborn. Heck, you all should kissing the ground where I took a dump! But you're just gonna let your kids, kids that look o older than TEN YEARS OLD, talk DOWN to the ALMIGHTY DRAGONBORN THAT HAS SLAUGHTERED OVER 1000 creatures and people? And on top of that, THEY ARE INVINCIBLE?!?! THAT"S THE BIGGEST MIDDLE FINGER TO THE DRAGONBORN EVER!!!

(Sigh)(That's my calming sigh). Well, it can't be fixed as of now. I guess the children of Skyrim are lost. We can only hope they improve next game. So, if you ever find yourself in the company of a Skyrim kid, do your best to find a way to KILL THEM!!!....Or just walk away, that work's too.