Ancient Scrolls of the Dwemer V
Song of the Alchemists
By Marobar Sul
When King Maraneon's alchemist had to leave his station
After a laboratory experiment that yielded detonation
The word went out that the king did want
A new savant
To mix his potions and brews
But he declared he would only choose
A fellow who knew the tricks and the tools
The King refused to hire on more fools.
After much deliberation, discussions, and debates,
The King picked two well-learned candidates.
Ianthippus Minthurk and Umphatic Faer,
An ambitious pair,
Vied to prove which one was the best.
Said the King, "There will be a test."
They went to a large chamber with herbs, gems, tomes
Pots, measuring cups, all under high crystalline domes.
"Make me a tonic that will make me invisible,"
Laughed the king in a tone some would call risible.
So Umphatic Faer and Ianthippus Mintburk
Began to work,
Mincing herbs, mashing metal, refining strange oils,
Cautiously setting their cauldrons to burbling boils,
Each on his own, sending mixing bowls mixing,
Sometimes peeking to see what each other was fixing.
After they had worked for nearly three-quarters of an hour,
Both Ianthippus Minthurk and Umphatic Faer
Winked at the other, certain he won.
Said King Maraneon,
"Now you must taste the potions you've wrought,
Take a spoon and sample it right from your pot."
Minthurk vanished as his lips touched his brew
But Faer tasted his and remain apparent in view.
"You think you mixed silver, blue diamonds, and yellow grass!"
The King laughed, "Look up, Faer, up to the ceiling glass.
The light falling makes the ingredients you choose
Quite different hues."
"What do you get," asked the floating voice, bold,
"Of a potion of red diamond, blue grass, and gold ?"
"By [Dwemer God]," said Faer, his face in a wince,
"I've made a potion to fortify my own intelligence."