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Ran into the same problem. I had helped 7 out of 5 people, done the two Wolf Queen (Potema) quests, also the Elisif's Tribute quest and Tending the Flames. Queen Elisif directed me to Falk Firebeard to purchase property. The option to purchase never appeared. Frustrated I cracked the CK open to look at the problem. Noticed the Favor252 "Making Friends & Influencing People" parent quest had set completed on objective 20 for "The Rift", not 30 for Haafingar. Falk's disposition toward me should've been 2 "Confidant" by now, but was only 1 "Friend". The condition to sell requires 2+. Cutting to the chase, I discovered a subquest called "HousePurchase" (form id A7B33) handled all the dialogue that evidently had not been triggered. So, I started the game up, and visited Falk Firebeard again, saved my game, selected him and entered:
setrelationshiprank player 3
then entered:
setstage A7B33 10
Immediately the purchase transaction occurred with funds exchange and Falk Firebeard then asked if I wanted to Decorate my new house. So I bought all of the upgrades in the usual way. Went to the house. Entered by the Upstairs Front Door (entry by the correct door is important). Jordis was there and the decorations were in place. All Good from there.
I don't recommend this as a regular cheat, more of a "break glass in case of emergency" measure.
I don't know who are you but I love you maaan! (Did I just assume your gender? sorry if you are female) :)
I was looking for this information all over the internet and noone could answer like you!
Thanks for your effort for following it up completely!
If you are bored, could you please figure out the setstage codes for the other houses as I'm having the same issue all over the realm with the exception of Hearthfire houses which are located outside of cities.
Must be one of the mods messing up something as I haven't had this issue before.